Grace has a face

Marty's been blogging a lot lately about grace - how unfathomable it is and how undeserving we are. Two days ago I met my sin. It was like it took on a physical form and shape - even had a face and I could name it - pride. I learned that most of my short-comings stem from that part of me. I've been learning a lot from the Lord lately about surrender and pride can have no part of that. I don't think I ever knew I was prideful really. I didn't want to believe that about myself, I wasn't like that (even in denying I was prideful there was pride). But there I was spending quality time with my husband, keeping him awake actually and I met my sin and it came crashing down around me. My pride hurts friendships. My big mouth hurts people and I'm so sick of doing that.

So, anyway, I met my sin on Saturday night. I saw just how disgusting I really am and how hurtful I really can be. I saw that there isn't a whole lot of humility in me and that I don't consider others better than myself (a pretty awful thing to admit, especially for all the world to see). But Sunday morning I met grace. The face of a friend. At the point where he should've said, "Yeah Joy that really hurt," he said, "That's okay, I know your heart." The truth is my heart is dirty and in need of cleansing but he knows that I'm fallible and in need of grace. He was a picture of Jesus to me in my time of need. He showed me grace when I absolutely did not deserve it.

Thank you Phil. You didn't say much but you gave me grace.